The Unsaid Words

I somehow get past that awkward first moment with you. Agrim Awasthi. I am thinking about you on the way back home how come I never saw you and the only time I came across you is in this dance group. You look calm, poised and you had a lovely smile to die for.

A smile which I didn’t reciprocate, leaving you puzzled. I wonder what you must be thinking about me, what a strange person. After having that moment with you we had decided on the dance pairs and selected 5 songs to perform on. I was the second in a row with Abhinav. Agrim was last with Himani. Sejal was the queen dancer and was paired with our dancer superhero Siddhant. Behind me were Khyati and Armaan. We decided to commence our dance practice early in the morning an hour before the office.

Oh boy, I have to face Agrim every day until this dance gig. What am I going to do? What have I done? I walk shakily towards the dance practice area and find Sejal sitting on the chair looking at her sprained leg. I see others gathered and I look for you, thank god you are not here yet. I just roam around waiting for someone to instruct me. I see Armaan marking our standing positions. I am walking over to my cross and I see a person coming down the parking on the speeding bike, just towards me, scaring me to death, putting brakes right in front of me. I just stand there like a squab with the tightly closed and pursed eyes, Oh God save me.

I am breathless. Am I alive? What on earth? I open my eyes when I hear laughter around, You open your helmet glass. I see You again! Agrim Awasthi. Oh Boy, You made my heart stop for a moment. I am breathing heavily. What The fuck? I look at you enraged. You smile at me, I ignore it yet again and you smile taking your revenge, and go park your speedy ass vehicle in the line, making me super annoyed at you. I don’t like you anymore, what a retard!

We practice and I can’t help but look at you dancing. You enjoy and make some great dance moves. I am a novice I feel out of the place, I pick up the steps the third time and I learn along. In all of the practice, I just look at you, with all the breaks we take, I follow you talking over the phone, mingling with the rest of the guys. Why did you that joke on me though, I am well, a little hating you too.

We gather again during the lunch hours and I am waiting with Siddhant. Siddhant is busy talking to someone, and so I go sit on a bike. Waiting for others to come. I see you walking down the parking stairs. You are walking towards me. I am looking at you. You are coming closer and closer, until you just stop in front of me. My mouth is dry and I look at you.

“What?” I say looking at you, very nervously.

“Get off the bike.” You say commanding at me.

“Why? I will sit wherever I’d like.” I say making my same shrewd face.

“Go sit on that one.” You say rather calmly.

“Oh so now you would tell me where should I sit. I would sit here only, you go find another one to sit on. I am not moving.” I say showing him a bit of a stance.

“It’s my bike, I am going for a tea break, want to join me?” You say looking at me with the same attitude.

Oh boy. I just get off dusting off my pants and hands, trying to look cool though embarrassed, and walk towards the dance area. What did I do, oh shit! You start the bike and you leave. What the fuck!

We all gather in the next 10 minutes and I dance. I like it and I am trying to behave cool with you and others. I drop all my professionalism and I laugh a little.

But I find it hard to get along with you. I am normal with the rest of the team, but I can’t stop looking at you and think about you. You intrigue me. I wonder if you notice me, at all.

I reach the office and I go over to the coffee area now, every day, since your seat is just here in front of this coffee machine, you are here with your teammate, drawing a certain flow chart of your project, on the glass boards. You are discussing and busy with your work. Drawing with black marker then, rubbing it, highlighting with redone. I keep looking at you. I am found more near the coffee machine in the morning, in lunch and in the evenings.

I am trying to work with all the new dance moves, You and YOU again, but it’s hard. I keep looking for you, as usual, Sugandha stops by and I am more enthusiastic today.

“Hey Sugandha, How are you?” I shake hands with her. She is taken by surprise, who made this otherwise pissed-off girl a bit more lively, her face can’t contain the excitement.

“Hey!” she says excited.

“Lets go have some coffee.” And here I am again, to watch you.

There is no one in your bay, Sugandha is busy making her coffee and I roam about in your bay and I look at your desk. It’s a lovely one. There’s is a Royal Enfield photo sketch of you sitting on your bike, holding your sunglasses. I pick it up and see. I see footsteps I keep the sketch and I turn around and I collide into you. Your keys fall off and I am in a panic attack right now. Oh, what the fuck.

“I am sorry, I was just here grabbing coffee, I just saw it here,” I say picking up your keys and handing it over to you. I am out of breath and You are looking at me. I am all sweaty, I don’t know what to do, I am caught yet again, stalking you.

“It’s Oka..” you are trying to say.. and see me rushing towards Sugandha in a hurry. You are puzzled again, I just leave with Sugandha without taking my coffee. Oh, what a freak! I feel stupid yet again. Sugandha is smirking at me.

“Ruchika, what was that? “ She is asking me sensing something is wrong.

“Nothing, we are just dancing together, I mean separately, I mean in the same group but apart” I am talking too fast and Sugandha is looking at me bewildered. What is wrong with me?

I look at her and I see Agrim coming towards me, I blank-eyed look at her and my head moves towards him. Oh god, why is he coming towards me now? I just rush Sugandha away and you are coming closer, I just sit on my desk and stare at my screen, my heartbeats rushing. I am taking deep breaths and You are standing at my desk, staring at me and I don’t lookup.

Oh now what, what is happening with me. What do I say? I look up and you hand me something.

TO BE CONTINUED

Author: Onesha

She is the funny one! Has flair for drama, loves to write when happy! You might hate her first story, but maybe you’ll like the next. She is the master of words, but believes actions speak louder than words. 1sha Rastogi, founder of 1shablog.com.

Leave a Reply